Hola Amigos!

Been a long time isnt it? Yeah it has been...a long dark tiring week for me and all of us..but we survived it some how.Well i thought of writing a post on  some of the most not-happening things in the world...But first ..lemme tell you about a post i wrote to post over here... a lil bit earlier.So..my random mind thought of writing a random post on a random evening..on Dinosaurs!!
The post went so 'Random' that the dinosaurs refused to get off my post! So i had to delete them instead!

So yeah where was I?..Yup most not-happening things in the world! Well i am refering to some of the things that are too dumb..to happen..and the people doing them or organizing them are even dumber (Dumb and dumber-2) So lets  start off with...mmmm..My favourite...Wikipedia!

Wikipedia
This is one of the most amazing storage of knowledge i have ever seen or read!!.I just wish to see where the servers of wikipedia are kept...they will be so humungous..like the towers of knowledge!Wow just imagine...so much of knowledge kept together..you just type 'A' and VOILA...whole history of the letter 'A'! Crap!I was a big supporter of wiki..until i got banned for vandalism..i dont know what that word means..but they told me i was removing their 'towers of knowledge'..i just edited a mistake and they Ban me!Great! So much for these towers of knowledge..
PS:The other day the owner was asking for donations..to buy some extra land for his 'towers of knowledge'.
no wonder..humph!

Ice skating
You know why i hate this!..YEAH You have guessed it right...CAUSE I DONT KNOW HOW TO ICE SKATE!!..Yeah i admit it i dont know how to iceskate..so what? whats the big deal...first time i tried ice skating was when my school took me to a deserted place in Al-Ain...Lol..it was a fun city ..i brought the skating shoes..wore em...and started to skate..huh..noo! i started to fall and fall and ...and kept falling until i could'nt stand up anymore..the small children were skating so well..So i stood up again...regained my confidence and i tried to skate..but then i fell again..this time  on my face! Nevermind...NEXT!

Fire works
Why..but but they are so bright and so fun to watch! ..Yea yea..they are..but when you are trying to remove global warming and on other hand recession is pullin you in red hot coal..you better think twice before wasting money..I wonder if we ever get rid of global warming(that wont happen though) then also they will fire crackers to celebrate..YAY..We have finished global warming..CO2 gas is in control!! Boom boom! Eh..Tsunami!! RUN!..


Pirates
Yeah i know i have written about them in my earlier posts...But i just had to include them..i have heard alot about  somali pirates..and they got on my nerves this morning..and i researched on them..So basically they are people.. who take a small boat goto a giant ship and fire tiny piny bullets ..and say we are here to hijack your vessel! And the people on the giant ship are like..HUH? what did they say??...Maybe they need help...lower the ladder! They come up, tie everyone up, hijack the ship and take the whole ship to somalia...GReat...(Dumb and dumber-3)

News channels
Are you getting bored...tired of watching same movies again and again..go watch a news channel! Yeah thats what  they want you to do..watch them instead of movies..they make up stories do anything they can do to 'sell' their channel..I still have a incident in my mind..that was really dumb..the news channels told the viewers..we are going to a village where a person is going to suicide in the evening!(no respect for people..instead of saving him..they are making money) They showed it the whole day the people gathered.....then when  the sun was about to set..the person was in no mood to suicide and he said GET THE HELL OUTTA MY HOUSE! The news reporter said ''we will be back after a short break''.They came back and nothing...like there was no news of that man! And about the infamous Breaking news...What does the breaking news actually break??!
Keep going guys!

Last but no the least!
The letters givin at the end of each internet form to prove that i am a human! I hate them.They are written in a way that you cant just read them!!..more-over sometimes i try typing the exact letters and they just dont freaking match! It keeps saying you are not a human..Goto hell.. you are not a human i am a human..HOMO SAPIEN! Yea i made you...now just shut it! Lol i got carried away..but yeah these are some of the most annoying things ..


I hope you enjoyed reading my post! :)





PSssssst : If anyone wants that dinosaur post just play chinese whisper with me!

Saifu(Trying to make a comeback)

Howdy readers!

So this is an incident that doesn’t usually happen…I have noticed it all the time that whenever something special happens to me…It kind of becomes more special …in a funny way, for example…I was the lead character in one of the plays I did…and everyone had a mic…just me without one…someone had to enter in midst of the play to give me the mic!...the curtain guy slept in the one previous to this one!...my first stage performance as a singer…well…I had the mic this time…STOPPED WORKING as soon as I started singing…amazing!...people laughed at me…and I had to continue to sing…coz the karaoke was playing in the background!

So apart from those and lots n lots of other stories…something happened on this Tuesday…u knw the city radio…over here in Dubai we have so many stations…and one of them is city 101.6…now these guyz asked me a question…well…to all but u know when u are alone in the room and the radio is playing…u feel as if the girl with the heavenly voice is solely talking to u…so this girl asks a fairly simple question…and I answer it via sms…and after some 2 minutes…she calls “ME” on the cell…that is…off air…and this is what happened!

Tia (the radio girl) : hey…

Me: hello…:S

Tia : may I speak to Mr. Rajesh please…

Me: What?...ohh Rajesh…yeah that’s me.(Not used to Mr, & I kinda get nervous with new girls on the phone…:P)

Tia : hehe…yeah so u have won the gift hamper worth of 300 AED …

Me : hmm…Thank u…

Tia : you have WON this PRIZE!!!

Me : yeh…thank u very much ( in a voice which felt like…somebody just died…NERVOUS!)

Tia : I am giving u a prize and u are sounding so low!...c’mon this is not fair!

Me : ohh...no actually that’s the way I sound…

Tia : No…listen…when I put you on air…you have to sound excited or else I will be in trouble…allryt?

Me : ohh…ok. No probs…I will try my level best!

Tia : ok fine…wait up…

So now this song is playing in the backdrop and after it ends she is just doing her job, giving info about the artist and all and was about to introduce me…meanwhile I thought of practicing the excitement…or to just act like I was… without knowing tht she put me on air without telling me…so this happens…

Tia : so this song was by shamur (let the music play) and he’s quiet popular even now because...

Me : (interrupting)HEYY TIAAAAAAA!!!

Tia : Wht the!!……heyyy!!!...who’s that:S??

Me : huh?...YEYY!!! it’s Rajesh…(just watch the excitement…lol)

Tia : alright…rajesh…y are u so excited?...(haha…I literally laughed…first she was like u are dull now excited?)

Me : hehe…no actually whenever I talk to city 1016 I get excited…(I had to use it to save myself coz to make them happy this is the last thing u can do! And it always works)

She asked the question again on air…and I answered and then she announced the prize…

Tia : congratulations Rajesh…you get a 300 dirham gift voucher to go n buy BLANKETS for you!

Me : (what? Blankets? but…since I had to sound excited!) YEYYY!!!(now this Yeyy literally sounded like I am scolding someone…YEY!!!...haha)

And the nightmare for me ended…but never the less I won something to cover myself up for the rest of Dubai…! BLANKETS!!!

This post is solely dedicated to the team of city 1016 and especially...TIAAAA!!!

- RJ Pareek

Greetings to all.........Last 2 weeks were really very boring and restless for us......because we were having pre-boards......yes pre-boards without boards,because its TCS(u can call it anything..."The Crap School")...........

So, Yesterday I was chatting with my friends till midnight which I usually do till 1 am or so, because thats the time when I feel cold and I feel sleepy and even while writing this I am feeling a bit of cold.............something similar happened yesterday as well, I went to sleep at 1:15 and then got up at around 9 am.......yes I usually get up at around 8, but this time I was late and as always my mom was standing next to my bed shouting on me...........'Get uppppppppp! its 9, even the animals are doing their routine works!!!!!'

Not an easy thing staying away from blogging. But YES! I have done it!

Hello everyone reading our blog, first of all I would like to thank all of our readers and followers for their support and comments...

Today while brushing my teeth, I suddenly got this damn idea(which i have been thinking over full day) that what would have been life if this bushy gadget - THE TOOTHBRUSH was not to be invented!!!...... ugghhh.. life would have been smelly..... so I did some research (cause we are the ANTHROPISTS) so as we know every thing (almost) has an inventor to its name, surprisingly the toothbrush too has an inventor or maybe i should say inventors,

haha sounds funny, but the it were the toppers of CHINESE GEEKDOM who first got this idea of using something to clean their oral cavities.... and guess what did they use for tht....... HORSE TAIL HAIRS attached to bamboo sticks!!!! aahh just imagine the taste of HORSE TAILS.....uuuggghhh!! and by now u must have figured out the reason behind the title
BUT still "frm a seed comes a tree " so toothbrush comes frm HORSE TAIL... (Just remember tht the next time you brush ur teeth) whatever, the chinese have given us a very good hint of oral hygiene and HATS OFF to them.

Good evening to all,

It’s not usual that I get depressed or disheartened, but today I am…not because of someone else…because of something and myself(this is the worst kind of depression).

Today I know exactly how “King Dasharath” felt…(let me brief you up on him)he was a character in the epic story…”Ramayan”…Since he was king, he loved to hunt…and there was a young boy in the same jungle whose parents became blind trying to save him when he was a kid…his name was “Shravan”…he was carrying his parents on his lone shoulders(no other mode of transport)to the 4 famous holy places in India…this was their last wish…

Now, amidst his journey, he stopped for a while because his parents were thirsty…meanwhile the King Dasharath was also hunting for a deer in the same region…in close proximity were they both…unaware of each other…Shravan finds a small pond of clean drinking water…and starts filling his vessel with the water…now since it was a pond, the water had to be checked again and again, if only the pure form was going in…and the sound “goodud goodud”(water filling sound)…started echoing in the jungle…this sound made the King alert…because the same sound is made when a deer is swallowing water…he moved towards the pond…he was so good with the bow and arrow(his weapon)…that he could fire without even looking at the prey…& He STRUCK!.. “aaaahhhh…..”…was the last sound Shravan’s parents heard from him…

Can you guess how The King would have felt?...He wasn’t aware of it…he didn’t intend it or mean to do it…but it was a mistake, and he was sorry for it…My friend Yusuf is hurt by something I did…which shouldn’t have been done…and I am sorry for it…but honestly, I never intended it…I never meant it…yet he’s hurt…I’ll have to bear the Brunch!

Good bye all…

- RJ Pareek

PS : The story might not be taken straight out of context…it may be slightly altered to fit the need of the writer.

Hello everyone,

10th Feb is not something special is it?...But for us it is...because if it weren't of this day...Gurpreet Singh wouldn't have existed, neither a great friend nor a fantastic human being(or his jokes..lol).

I remember the day I met him…a cute lil boy…innocent,filled with energy, always active, a little confused, a little innovatively mischievious … yes, tht’s how he was! He was 9 or 10 back then…he’s 17 now. And what surprises me is his ability to remain the same...(mentally ofcourse)…When I look back after some 7-8 years…I find the same Gurpreet always. Whereas all of us have changed with time…me, amit, Mustafa(extremely), yusuf, shariq and meher too(although they are relatively new).

I used to never miss my school any day…not because I loved to study…because I loved to spend time with my friends…especially him…and to tell you the truth, It’s still the same…I attend the school because of my friends…it’s the habit he gave me when we were young.(still are…dun worry)

Why I say all this is because I owe a lot to him…I started playing cricket, I can do a bit of bhangra, I can speak a bit of punjabi and as a result understand Punjabi songs, learnt to respect all religions and most importantly look at everybody with the same reference point without any preconceptions.

You might be thinking is he my only friend?...no we all are equally bounded but it’s his day today and it’s nothing like we celebrate birthdays n all…but yes we do gift each other some momentos and stuff.

Finally this post is Solely dedicated to GS Gill...the guru of humour & sarcasm... to thank him for being there whenever required with a hope that he will in the future too.(would have written more but have physics exam tomorrow…)

Paji…This one’s for you…kinne kinne jana….???lol

-A loyal Friend...to another one.

Hello everyone.... this is Mehar a new member or you can say a new idiot who has joined the 'Anthropists'. I wanted to come over here the same day when my friends made this blog but i couldn’t come because i was in India..playing a cricket tournament!
Let me give you my introduction : I am 16 years old, studying in 11th, i have taken science just because i wanted to face beamers of chemistry and maths(lol). Basically i am from Punjab.. but i don't look like a Punjabi. I am really crazy about cricket because i always talk about cricket. Now let me tell you about my ambition, although it always kept changing from air force to army to bike racer to cricketer but now i have finally decided and becoming a cricketer is my final destination. I choose this because i was very passionate about cricket..and i was always supported by my friends and family.

Last but not the least: Life for me is filled with loads of fun and i want to learn new things in future. Please bear with me because this is the first time i m writing a blog.......CHEERS
-Gary

(Venue : 162nd floor burj khalifa at 10:30, February 3rd)
Ahlan wa Sahlan People!
This is your beloved host RJ, and we are on TOP of the world! Before we go on to the main event let's touch up upon the White (we promote peace) Carpet...
Entering here in her beautiful LOLLS ROYCE is MISS HAFSA!!! Let's talk to her...
How do you feel to be here tonight?
Hafsa : lol..I feel honoured and very happy to be here lol...since I have a nomination too, excited! lol And definetly looking forward to the main event! lol.(entering inside the lift)
Suddenly appearing from nowhere is...Miss Aditi Kapoor! ... Hello madam...thank you so much for being here...your views about today's awards?
Aditi : No comments.
Well...She sure is a VIP guest alright!
Next here is Mr Shafiq Khan in a Ford!...and thre seems to be some Fuzon between him n the car coz it's taking too long to park! Let's here it frm the MAN himself!
Hi SFK, how are you? And are you happy to be nominated?
SFK: I am absolutally fine! Very happy to be nominated indeed. And I have my baby with me as my lucky charm!(a french doll tht he still plays with)
No more VIP's to be seen...people rushing in to meet the superstars we don't have. But apart from everything, we have our own
Gurpreet singh sporting a superb suit, By Nike. And sports shoes below it by Adidas!(very brand conscious)
Shariq shahid, acting as the hanger for his clothes,(wear them shark!)
Yusuf Khan, A coat and a Bermuda! Interesting! and
Mustafa Khan, wearing a pathani suit! ( I wonder y?...hmm)
And BTW I am wearing a Georgio Armani personally designed hand crafted hand stitched Underwear...Under my cheaply rented Suit! And Amit Kumar is still in the shop selecting a suit for himself.
So tht's it from the Carpet which is now red!(people killing each other!) Moving on to the main event...

--The first Category we focus upon is...The Best follower for the month...to give this one we have with us...Shariq n Gurpreet ... ( awesome music)...
Gill : Good evening!
Shariq : Good evening to you too.
Gill : I mean to the audience!
Shark : Ohk so the award for spying on us...or following us goes to...Lazy18! (takes half an hour to come on to the stage...lolling...dancing...giggling...flying kisses in the air)
lazy: Lol... I knew it!(she paid us)

--Ohk so the next award for the best rated post goes to...let me check the current ratings...yes, Butty Natasha just manages to make it by 0.01 rate higher than the tuxy ride!(heart break!)
Congrats to Natasha with a Butt!

--Moving on...we have the most pretigious award of the Night...Best Writer...to give away we have Miss hafsa!
Hafsa : :)...And the award for best writer goes to..to...My Favourite! AARJAY! Yeyyeyy!
(receiving the award)...I would like to thank all my friends for being so supportivly jealous...so that I could perform better and better! Thank you.( all friends : You or me?...who kills him?)

--Ohhkay Wow!...coming to the next award...Post of the Month...
To give away...we have...The Man himself...
Mr Shafiq khan : Hello to all the ladies!
Ladies : HAAAYEEEEE!
SFK : :D And I feel ok ok to announce that it goes to The Diary Entry by RJ!
Me : Ohh well...This is amazing! 2 in a row!...Thank you Guyz!

--And we have Mustafa khan to give away 2 Important awards...Best debut as well as Most Inspirational post...(weird Beats in the background)
Masti : Assalamwualikum...I am honoured to be standing here and receiving this award...Thank you so much to all the people who voted for me!
Me : Mustafa...you have to announce...What are you doing?
Masti : Sry...I mugged it up so many times that couldn't stop...So the award for the most Inspirational post goes to...not again!...Guys! WAKE UP! by RJ!...Idiot.(his post)
--And the Best Debut will be shared equally by Gurpreet and Yusuf! Give them Some Big Hands!(people slapping them)

--Alright...so after all those emotions(audience : which?:S)...we have the funniest post of the month to be given away by...Me...And it goes to...(people scream :Tuxy Tuxy !!!)...:)...and it goes to...fingers crossed!...OVERDOSE! by Gurpreet singh!...*Claps* by some *slaps* by some!(they were overdosed)
Gurpreet : I would thank my couzins for this...who have such great sense of humour and also my parents for giving me birth! Thank you.
Alright! There is a performance by Me n Yusuf...an action packed one! Before the Last 2 Awards of the night. Enjoy!
(APPLAUSES ALL AROUND) Woof!...Tough job!

--And before the stage collapses, let's announce the best supporting role award! And to do the honours we have Yusuf Khan!
YK : Hayy Is everyone enjoying the night? Good...and the award for the best supporting role in a post goes to...Amit Kumar for A tuxy ride!...He deserves it!
Amit is not here...I would take that on his behalf. Thank you.

Most dedicated person towards the Blog is well...SHARIQ SHAHID without a Doubt...(A STANDING OVATION)...he has done so much for the well being of the blog...Incredible! *claps continue*

So that was it from the Monthly awards(everyone having dinner)...will meet you people later ... on the next awards...with a different host(audience : u suck anyways!) different nominies and it will certainly be bigger and better than this one!

Take care...bubye!
PS : Hafsa & Aditi still fighting over the fridge!

Try your best to reach that floor....the first one to reach receives...a fridge made of thermocol!(available till stock lasts)

Ladies & Gentlemen...
Welcome to the First Blog Awards of the month...we have decided to keep this tradition and continue on with it...after receiving a great deal of support...we are now full of confidence and want to write more and more...to encourage better writing, the awards have come into place. Let me thank our sponsors before we carry on...Adidas, Nike, Reebok, Ray ban etc. are not our sponsors..we have no sponsors...so anybody with extra money is coordially invited!
HERE ARE THE NOMINATIONS for different categories...
shhheeeuiiinnggg...(weird noise)..mic testing hello..hello?..1234..7...100?..

--Follower of the month...as this blog runs majorly due to them...let's kick it with them
1. Lazy18... lazy...just by name!
2. Pragya...hidden regular reader...(comments on the fone mostly)
3. Shafiq Khan...Thank you sir for ur support!

--Next nominations are for ratings...although people have kept in mind the CRISIS while rating but there are few posts which got what they deserved~
1. A Tuxy ride!...still riding.
2. Sharp pencil + jealousy = A nomination!...lol BUTTY NATASHA!
3. rail-WAYS to earn...it's rightly earned it's place.

--Blog awards are nothing without this one!..Best WRITER award...Any Guesses?
1. Saifu...saifly here.
2. GILL will?...or may take it!...let's wait and watch!
3. RJ...makes his WAY to the nominations of this one!

Before moving on to the next segment...joining me quickly is Mustafa Khan...
Masti: Howdy people!..ARE WE HAVING A GOOD TIME?..(audience: Good waste of time,yes@)
Me: Without wasting any more time...the next category is...

--Post of the month
1. Legendary Egypt...love the pyramids.
2. Tuition Mystery...well...no more a mystery!
3. and last but not the least...Diary entry from the soul.

--Now moving on to the Rib tickling Funniest post of the month
1. One of my favourites...Overdose!
2. A tuxy ride!
3. A teenager's regular day...but this is not!...it comes once in a month!

--Coming to the most important award of the night...Most dedicated person towards the blog...It's obvious...but still the nominations:
1. RJ
2. GS GILL
3. Saifu!

--Now the posts which have not only entertained but inspires us all...Most inspiratinal post of the month:
1. Guys...Wake up! we have just started.
2. No more hot people please...well I say keep them coming!
3. We are Idiots...wht do yo think?

--Are we having some fun tonight?...(audience...Yeah yeah!..fun?..huh)...Moving on to the best debut post...
1. YK's Let's hear from the boy next door.
2. We sure call him Guru..by GILL
3. and yes Isko pehchaan lo...by Da shark!

--Now something for the supporters...lol...not for you...the award for the supporting role in a post...and the nominees are
1. Gurpreet singh...in clever shifters,
2. Amit kumar in A tuxy ride!
3. Shariq shahid in Bone!...ohh sry Broke!
These were the categories and their nominations...stay tuned to know the results of the awards in Another post.

The Jury members are...Yusuf, Mustafa, Shariq, Gurpreet, and yes I want them too...!
Thank you for bearing it all!...GOOD NIGHT!{angry audience}...auch auch!...no stones please!
-Anthropists